It is only upon reflection that much of this becomes known. Before, it was not even a thought or a feeling.
Remembering how, as a young child growing up in Jamaica back in the ?50s, the idea of inside the house?and outside the house did not feel like separation. The doors between inside and outside were almost nonexistent in that I was able to move?between the inside of the house and the outside of the outdoors with ease.
I remember?an ongoing communication with what I came to understand later had a name ? GOD. So in my childlike understanding, when a friend said they were going to take me to Sunday school and church, the inner response was ?GOD has a house here!? Of course, with the curiosity and boldness of the child, I had to go see this House.
Returning once again at 62, to remembering?the ongoing communication…there were no words back then, or a need for words to KNOW.??It seems that?I have many words now in which I can express this, however all the words fall short of the feeling?of the experience that did not require anything, did not require explanation, did not require the chatter of the mind as it does its dance of labeling and judging.
IT simply fills me up and allows me to soar high, to dive deep, and live.
The invitation to remember was extended to me around 1997, when the life that I knew was shattered into unknown number of pieces.
I put the word LAMENTATIONS to this recounting.
The life that had been built was now reflected in the shards of a clay pot that?lay in front of the man who had pulled me aside to have a conversation?
Each piece a lamentation?
?Don?t you remember how I etched into each piece how much I love you??
My helper in sharing this with you, his name is Thom, posed it to me this way: ?Could you recreate for me the context of where you felt yourself to be at this time and a brief sketch of how it led to where you are today.”
It is my hope that you too, will take the time out to remember, and if this story sparks that beginning in you, then my story would have served its purpose and YOUR story becomes the one of meaning for the?ones who have a heart to hear and listen with.